This man is the enemy.
Meet the appallingly-named Bud E-luv. I'm sure he thinks his name is most amusing. BUT I DO NOT LIKE HIM OR HIS NAME. Every time I google e-luv, in order to find gushing praise for my book, what do I get? I'll tell you. Pages and pages about the ironically-moustached lothario you see here talking into his ironic 80s cellphone. Retire NOW, Mr Bud E-luv or face the consequences of my WRATH.